Behind the Mask: Poetry and Pictures

Grace in the face Of love and forgiveness Illuminates my heart With joy in your presence For I gazed upon the face of God And felt the warmth of His embrace When I humbled myself to You Who offered pardon and grace My soul called out for You And in love You came Now my spirit leaps At the very mention of Your name I long for Your love I thirst for Your affection I have Your approval I crave Your attention Nothing comes between us No bondage of guilt restrains Now, finally, I

When I face the mess Corruption and politics Deceit, greed, and oppression On the outside, unable to look in Locked inside, unable to escape Too young to quit, too old to press on Only God can make a way Through the mess of this day The days run together Nothing seems to change Burdens pile atop each other Crushing my spirit, depressing me Why is life like this? What should I do? I have no clue to the what or the why I must adapt I must overcome I cannot do it alone, God enli

I feel like I’m going to do something big with my life He said I used to think that too I replied What? You don’t think you have? Not really. You don’t think helping thousands of people walk is really big. Hmmm Winter depression has been deep Too deep to see the good being done at the surface Atop South Mountain I pray Waiting for a sense of presence and hoping for a word of encouragement I consider for what I’m to be grateful Eventually, I notice my hands I hold them out and

So many times down though the ages, Men and women have come together with special embraces. The fruit of their deep and abiding love Was a child, a gift from God above. But not all special embraces are blessed with God’s consideration. Thus some lovers are left with the sorrow of no fruition. Such was the case with your mother and father, Yet they never gave in to their despair. They clung to the hope of your conception, And with the help of their noble physicians, hope was f

“It’s still so hard,” he cries As I reach for his hand and reply “I cannot even imagine.” I can only be still and listen. He tells of happy times He shares their struggles They have overcome together They have loved each other. Through blurry eyes I see A nearly broken man before me Broken but for the hope that remains To one day see her and hold her again Together in the presence of our Father Face-to-face with our Savior The Spirit within us whispers Comfort for temporal lo

Alive in autumn Beloved and new Chosen to exist By God and us, too Born in the summer A blessing, a girl, Daddy’s little girl! Our own priceless pearl Snuggles and kisses Noon teas, bike riding T rail hiking and house Fishing, four-wheeling Evening dinner talks Tutoring, fighting Counseling, coping Striving, succeeding Singing downstairs or Alone in your room You’re pulling away Becoming your own So young and unsure Am I good enough? What do the boys think? Why is this so tou

As I have known You I see You but I want to see You For who You are I want to believe That You are love. I want to be known As You know me I need to feel loved As You love me I want to be Yours Safe in Your arms. Make me feel good enough To be loved Good enough To be Your son Good enough To let go Of my fear Of my shame. Father cover me In Your grace In Your love Make me Good enough. Let me come home To You Run to me With open arms Hold me close Never let me go.

At your bedside Waiting for open eyes Hoping for a smile So little time left I crawl into bed I hold you like my child The smell of your T-shirt The familiar scent of my father The ache in my heart grows How much longer Are you in pain Can you hear me What do you see Angel choirs and Jesus enthroned Or darkness, suffering, and longing What do you feel Hope and eternity Or sadness and death I sing hymns Read favorite Scripture Profess my love and gratitude Will it be tonight W

I walked beside my Lord today And listened as He spoke. He told me that I slipped again and failed to show His love. He was in my home yesterday And saw me lose control. He said He was disappointed In the harsh words I chose. I told Him of my frustration, I told Him that I cared, I told Him I am conflicted By the anger that I feel. He said He’s always in my heart and knows the place He holds. He knows I dearly love Him. He knows how hard I try. Suddenly I stopped to ask Him,

He makes my reality I am a living virtuosity By Christ set free I am not me But Christ Alive in me He takes my frustration Restlessness and damnation He erases the pain Removes the stain By His blood I am washed clean I am free to be me He lifts me out Of my self-destructive pit With His love My heart’s darkness is lit He shines to me In me, and through me The good you see Is Christ in me By Christ set free I am not me But Christ alive In me

Let your love fall down on me gently Like snowflakes on Lake Champetra For I am weak and fragile And find it hard to receive love Let your presence surround me slowly Like smoke billowing from a fire For I am unworthy of your holy touch And find the gift of your presence overwhelming Let me hear you say again, “I love you” Then I will believe it was You and not me Let me sense calm assurance of trust And know my fleeting contentment need not depart Let fear loosen its g

Guilt shackled my life But grace unleashed peace From the bonds of fear Freedom brought release Filled with the Holy Spirit Joy reigns in my heart I live to worship In life set apart. I live to worship Jesus, my King I live to praise Him He is all that I am He is all that I have He is all that I need He’s my Savior and I live to worship Him

His ashen face concealed the usual joyful expression. All lines, tubes, and monitors removed, He now lay unresponsive, Warmed only by the tears and soft whispers of his wife’s last embrace. What could I say as I sat and held her hand in the night hours Waiting for her family to arrive? What could I do but silently look from her to him? I prayed for wisdom and strength Only to feel helpless and alone. “He loves me so much,” She confessed with confidence. His love comforted her

I am with you, But you are not near. I talk to you, But I do not hear you respond. The joyful tones in your voice Are rarely heard. Your speech at times is slurred And filled with thoughtful pauses. The energetic gleam in your eyes Is fatigued. Your confident presence Makes room for fear. Your posture Is stooped in defeat. “What is wrong with your dad?” So many have asked, Only to recount some discouraging tale Of misspoken words or confused behavior. Is it so hard to see Why

Time and circumstance reduced me to melancholy, Yet you remained hopeful. I withdrew in isolation, While your arms stayed open. Despite my volatile temperament, You were a calming presence. The walls were closing in, Your strength held me safely. Drowning in despair, You gave me hope. Through vision blurred with tears, I could always see your joy. Though the darkness hovers as an ominous cloud, The light of your presence lingers faithfully. You illuminate the path to happines

The happiness I know in loving you is only the beginning Of the joy I encounter each day as I watch you nurture our children. I love the smile on your face when they say something unexpected, The sound of your voice as you introduce each of them to me on the phone, The kind way you teach them how to say “please” and “thank you” and “I love you,” The look in your eyes when you point to Paige as she skips and runs, The hushed tone in your voice when you ask me to watch Spencer

She baked my favorite cookies And thinks I do not taste More than just the sweetness But of the pain erased. She kisses my feverish cheek And thinks I do not feel The tender touch of grace That has the power to heal. She cleaned the whole house today And thinks I do not smell The fragrance of her work That helps to keep us well. She spoke to my teacher last night And thinks I did not hear They talked of my behavior And how to calm my fear. She taps my daddy under the

Overtaken by loneliness, I sit at my desk to study. Peering out the window, Watching life pass away. The leaves have all fallen, and I’ve only just begun. Life is but a vapor! Am I certain of my choices? Will life’s end bring regrets? Will I rue my day of admission? My wife, I never see. She, too, has made choices. What will our end be? Two separate lives, I had not envisioned. United in marriage, Separated by choices. Are we certain of those choices?

Our life together is like Calm peaceful waters Deep with tranquility Covered with the breath of God The sunlight dancing across the waves Fills me with the joy we have known Your eyes on our wedding day Your smile at the birth of our children Your embrace each day of our lives together In your presence, I am breathless With you, I am at home You are everything to me The warmth of an open fire On a serene autumn night Illuminating the colors The beauty of God’s creation From t

Father, how do You tolerate us? We seem unable to learn, Making the same mistakes time and again. Yet You so loved us That You gave us Your only Son. Father, why do we do it? Repeatedly abusing Your Spirit’s temple, We indulge and suffer. Yet, if we believe in You, We will not die But live eternally. Father, will You help us? Will you shape and mold us Into the likeness Of Your Beloved Son And complete in us The work You have begun?